How do you keep a long-distance relationship healthy?

Tips for Surviving a Long Distance RelationshipTalking in the Morning and Evening. Always have an in-person outing planned. Visit us where you live. Long distance couples don't have to rely on 3pm, m.

Postal delivery, waiting for news that is at most four days old. It is not wise to be too “clingy and possessive”. You two don't really have to communicate 12 hours a day to keep the relationship going. Many couples think they need to compensate for the distance by doing more.

And it may only make things worse. Soon you'd get tired of “loving. One of the Lasting users shared how he came to appreciate his long-distance status. I was able to dedicate 100% of my attention to my girlfriend when we were together.

When we were apart, I focused on classes and spent time with my friends. It worked great for us when I was in law school. As a young man who was terrified of any kind of commitment, I found that I could only afford to fall in love with a girl if I was at least 500 miles away, 1 The first time, we both genuinely tried to make it work, but things fell apart spectacularly, not least because we were too young and immature to manage the distance. The moment you stop having some milestone to look forward to, the harder it will be to maintain the same enthusiasm and optimism in the other, 2 One thing that is true about all relationships is that if they are not growing, then they are dying.

And growth is even more crucial in a long-distance relationship. There must be some goal that you are achieving together. You must have some cause that ties you together at all times. There must be a converging trajectory on the horizon.

Otherwise, you will inevitably break up. This can manifest itself in several ways within a long-distance relationship. In some cases, people become insanely jealous or irrationally possessive because they perceive that every casual social outing is potentially threatening to a relationship, 4 “Who the hell is Dan? Tell me who the hell is this guy Dan, and why he writes on your Facebook wall. Oh, is he your stepbrother? I didn't know you had a stepbrother.

Why didn't you tell me you had a stepbrother? Are you hiding something from me? Okay, maybe I wasn't listening when you told me, but I still don't want you going out with Dan, okay? Remember, love is not enough. Both need to have aligned visions of life, shared values and mutual interests. If she has a 10-year contract working for the Singapore government, and he is dogsledding around the polar ice caps, well, then there's not much hope for that relationship, no matter how much the two people love each other. Can it work? Yes, you can.

But then again, that's true for the vast majority of relationships, 10 And it doesn't mean we shouldn't ever try. Relationships can be complicated and difficult. But few people know that there are some pretty clear signs to know if a relationship is going to work or not. Put your email in the form below to receive my 51-page eBook on Healthy Relationships.

Learn about the idea that transformed a depressed wanderer into one of the most important philosophers in history. Read about it in my free 19-page ebook. In addition to finding common activities to do, it is very important to schedule an individual time, so that you can check in and chat, like a normal couple. Relationship records are extremely important for any couple, but they are especially crucial for long-distance couples, where they are less part of each other's everyday life.

While it's always fun to pick up the phone and call your partner out of nowhere, it's also important to schedule an amount of time so you can spend some time. Different platforms like Facetime and Skype are a great way to stay in touch because you can see each other's faces. While you might not think of Facetiming as anything other than a simple phone call, seeing your partner, their facial expressions and their surroundings can do a lot to help them feel more connected to each other despite the distance. In addition to Facetime and Zoom, new apps are appearing that make scheduling time to hang out even more fun and easier.

Zoom, for example, is a great new platform for keeping in touch. Zooms allow you to schedule meetings ahead of time and put them on the calendar, which not only serves as a great reminder for your next virtual date, but also creates something to look forward to later in the week. For those of use who are totally away after the workday, there are also things like Google Hangouts that you can use on your computer, and things like House Party that you can use on your phone to keep in touch. House party is a fun option because it has games built into the video chat app that you can play to help keep things lively.

Adopting these different platforms and changing them from time to time is a good way to maintain a good amount of communication with your partner. To close this gap, keep each other informed about your daily life. Share anecdotes about coworkers or what happened on your trip. Talk about what your friends are doing, your last walk or what you're preparing for dinner.

Sharing photos of friends, pets, or things at home can also help reduce emotional distance. Communication is one of the 10 signs of a healthy relationship, and it is absolutely necessary to make long-distance relationships work. So take the time to stay in touch with your partner on a regular basis and talk about your expectations and boundaries around communication during the week. Knowing that you have a Skype date every Friday feels good to wait, as does a morning text or text via Instagram.

More importantly, knowing that your partner is usually unavailable in the afternoon or on Mondays will help alleviate any confusing signals that might cause an unanswered text or an unopened SnapChat video. Long-distance relationships can work; many couples who have survived long periods of long distance can attest to that. While every relationship has unique challenges, there are some general issues that present themselves in long-distance relationships. You may not be able to set an exact end date about how long you will be apart, but you should discuss how you want the course of the relationship to go.

It is also worth considering that people often regard long-term relationships as a temporary solution to distance that should not be permanent. Setting boundaries will ensure that both you and your partner are on the same page about what is and isn't acceptable in your relationship, so you can be respectful of each other and the relationship. Anyway, you'll often find that open communication, honesty, respect and trust go a long way to helping your relationship go the distance, so to speak. Paradoxically, you end up with this strange dynamic in which the long-distance relationship forces you to make much more meaningful commitments to a person you've had much less exposure to than in a normal relationship.

Regular relationships can be difficult to manage, and long-distance relationships can often be even harder. No matter how much you love each other, there's probably a part of you that wonders how or if your relationship will survive the long distance between you. Anyone who has been in a long-distance relationship can attest to the underlying heartache of being separated from the one you love. Long distance is easier for both partners if there is an agreed end date for distance or a specific shared relationship goal in mind.

Regardless of the reason why you and your partner are estranged, it's important to recognize that LDRs come with a unique set of challenges that need to be considered and addressed throughout the course of your long-distance relationship. The rest said the relationship lasted until they were reunited with their partner, but about a third of the relationships that survived the distance ended within 3 months of their meeting. Apps like Relish can help you and your partner navigate the tricky territory of long distance with expert advice from tried and true relationship coaches. .


Constance Thuringer
Constance Thuringer

Freelance coffee practitioner. Freelance social media lover. Infuriatingly humble pop culture evangelist. Unapologetic internet scholar. General bacon specialist.